another moral hangover. fuck.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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