Can Purell be used as lube?
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
is wine microwaveable?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
