I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
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