Don't you send me to vm
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
