I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
