DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize