Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
