thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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