Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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