his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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