And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
