Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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