you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
My pussy is not your playground.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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