He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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