yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
