my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
