Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
