Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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