so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
