Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
