so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
