I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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