Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
My boss asked me to pass over one of my business cards and instead I had condoms fall out of my wallet, how’s your day going??
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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