@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
