This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
