I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
We need to rekindle our bromance
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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