Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
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