Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize