I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
