Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize