Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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