Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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