Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Randomize
