Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
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