please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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