I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
