If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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