Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
