The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Can vaginas get frostbite?
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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