3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Randomize
