I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
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