He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Randomize
