Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize