we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
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