so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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