I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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