I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
