Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Randomize
