There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize