she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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