sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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