she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
